Mother

Gone forever existing as a fading memory Death by suicide can still visualise your sad listless eyes Mother i will never forget about you You’re indelible illuminating presence is embedded in my damaged mind There was once bitterness and anger at losing you in the apex of my adolescence Now though its been replaced by […]

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My Depression

My depression isn’t romantic its mind numbing boredom Its waking up aching in pain with this weight in your bones Its being able to leave my house for fear of a panic attack Its eschewing looking into the mirror for fear of seeing the monstrous creature that will materialise in the bathroom mirror Its going […]

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Spiralling Out Of Control

My mind is beset with anxiety today I started the day feeling normal just slightly nervous Then over the course of the day my anxiety intensified as i spiralled out of control By the end of the day my hands were shacking i could barely breathe This anxiety is killing its living in hellIts rendered […]

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The Terror

The news fills me with dread I see a array of devastating reports on climate change The burning of our rainforest artic on fire oceans rising apocalyptic storms and hurricanes The terror the horror of our future what will life be like in 50 years I have trouble breathing as these nightmarish climate stories provoke […]

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Rumbling In My Stomach

I see has angelic radiating face my heart flutters My stomach rumbles with nervous excitement He smiles at me with his immaculate iridescent smile Why is he gazing at me i averted my gaze as his luscious emerald green eyes beguile me When i see him at the coffee bar in the university campus I’m […]

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Climbing Up The Walls

Arms shacking shivering my body sways manically back and forth My breathing is erratic uncontrolled the curtains are firmly closed No lights in my home I can’t face the world the dark eerie outside I turn off my phone there’s complete silence no music as i sit on the edge of my bed wanting this […]

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Death

Laying prostrate almost comatose in my bed dreaming of death Sick and twisted thought are ruminating in my mind I cant move from the pain of this depression i want death i want to be nothing I am already dead as the emotion has been vanquished from my body as this dead sensation permeates my […]

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A Passenger

Existing as a observer of life Not actively engaging in the essential activities of the human race I’m on the outside wanting to be a participant in the wonders of life Wanting love wanting to traverse the globe and witness fantastical awe inspiring vistas but my disorder precludes me from venturing into the wide world […]

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Concealing My Disorder

I exist in this mask this persona that portrays a veneer of sanity Behind the mask lurks a inner world of darkness with a pernicious social anxiety and crippling depression that i conceal from all of humanity I go out to the world interact with friends smiling laughing concealing my pain never frowning never disclosing […]

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