Why I Self Harm

The sun is setting on a another sweltering July evening. I peer outside my window with my stoned eyes looking at another majestic picturesque sunset. The full spectrum of colours on display the yellows and reds inflame my mind as I’m standing glaring outside my bedroom window viewing the sublime evening panorama of a luscious […]

Echoes

Outside my window I hear a cacophony of birds singing The wind howls in this bleak autumn day There a blanket of grey in the skyline that haunts my town I hear the distant echoes of dogs barking children playing mothers bellowing Inside my fortress of solitude there’s a absence of colour I look around […]

I Miss You Mum

6 years this week you killed yourself It hurts like acid burning a hole in my stomach I miss you think about you everyday Miss your hugs your effusive hugs you bestowed upon me I miss you mum i cry when I hear your funeral songI shed a profusion of tears when I gaze at […]

Voices In My Head

Lost in the walls of my mind Lost all alone with these venomous inner voices that reverberate inside my damaged mind They scream they bellow when i loom at my ghastly visage in the mirror They scream freak ugly scum as i shudder These voices bark at me in the night They tell me to […]

Mother

Gone forever existing as a fading memory Death by suicide can still visualise your sad listless eyes Mother i will never forget about you You’re indelible illuminating presence is embedded in my damaged mind There was once bitterness and anger at losing you in the apex of my adolescence Now though its been replaced by […]

My Depression

My depression isn’t romantic its mind numbing boredom Its waking up aching in pain with this weight in your bones Its being able to leave my house for fear of a panic attack Its eschewing looking into the mirror for fear of seeing the monstrous creature that will materialise in the bathroom mirror Its going […]

The Serenity Of My Bubble Bath

After a day of anguish and stress I retreat to my bathroom Draw a luscious bubble bath with serene inducing aromas that soothe my anxiety I remove my sweaty cloths and disappear into a sea of bubbles with My naked body is transformed into a euphoric relaxed state in the bliss of my bath The […]

The Darkest Day Part 2

After a eternity as me and my grieving stoic father sat languidly in the funeral car directly behind the hearse containing my mothers decaying corpse. Then the rest of the funeral attendees got inside their respective vehicles and we could proceed to the church. It was a long arduous journey as we travelled at a […]

Late Stage Depression

My depression that’s lived inside my entire life has mutated Its mutated it’s something malignant that left my mind in protracted states of atrophy My melancholia has metastasised into these suicidal thoughts Days spent in agony barely able to walk to talk to maintain a functioning body and mind On days off i lay in […]

Daddy Please Don’t Shed Any Tears At My Funeral

Daddy don’t cry don’t mourn for when I’m gone As the priest reads my funeral eulogy don’t lament my passing As the music reverberates in the cavernous church stay stoic and austerePlease don’t cry don’t mourn for a life bereft of meaning or purpose Soon i will be gone the black dog of depression is […]