Silent Hurt

I’m screaming nobody hears my forlorn cries for help
I bellow these laments of hurt that are lost in my introverted consciousness
The hurt the goddamn hurt the pain of being alive
Its inside of this interminable unexpressed suffering

Rather than express divulge my suffering i repress I retreat
I lacerate my arms in a masochistic act to feel my pain
I eschew talking to a therapist or seeking medication for my illness
The hurt festers and metastasises in me till the point when suicide seems more preferable than stying alive

On the outside my friends my family have no idea I’m existing with a mental illness
I perpetuate a facade a mask
As i project a image of serenity
They are entirely unaware of my anxiety my depression that crippling silent hurt of being me

I scream i am desperate to convey my pain to anybody
I fantasise about getting hug getting a acknowledgment from my pain
I dream of eruditely articulating my depression to a close friend and having streams of tears flowing down my face and feeling the euphoria of expressing the pain

Instead i repress i hide the pain
I carry on this facade to protect myself
I am alone in my hurt in my wounded fragile soul
I am this vulnerable broken women longing for anybody to hear my silent screams of emotional anguish

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