Nobody

All alone in the bleak desert wilderness of my adulthood
Nobody to hear my forlorn despair cries for help
Nobody out there that acutely cares if I’m alive or dead
I tweet i vent my fury on YouTube nobody watches nobody responds

I’m a ghost a mirage a walking haunted spirit creature trapped in this mortal body unable to extricate myself from myself
I don’t really exist i never go out and socialise i am permanently ensconced in my room existing as a hermit
My social anxiety has grown so severe interacting with strangers is so onerous i stay inside hidden
I stay locked inside my room for days leaving only to depart to work or to attend my studies

A few friends occasional call ignore there profuse requests
I hide my self inside the hell the perdition of my perennial depression
I self harm to feel something to feel a modicum of life even if that’s excruciating physical pain
I know now i am cursed destined to live in agony all alone with nobody caring or showing a morsel of humanity for my psychological aliments

I all alone in a godless soulless universe
God has forsaken my soul
Mother left me at 13 god is absent from my life
I am lost in the abyss dreaming of suicide of the fantasy of not existing

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