Beauty

I am obsessed with my physical appearance
Spending hours in the mirror critiquing my repugnant pallid visage
I want to be beautiful to be the object of attraction
I want this flawless physical perfection that’s illustrated by instagram models

These instagram influencers with there image they portray of a idyllic life
With there immaculate faces and tanned toned glistening bodies that exude beauty from every pore
They seem so happy to be alive to be comfortable in their skin
They show no anxiety in smiling in revealing their picture perfect iridescent ivory teeth

Its such a stark contrast to my life in my grim student existence
I life without sunshine without beauty
I rarely venture outside apart from attending lectures
On these sporadic occasions i feel the anxiety the sickness at my grotesque freakish physical presence

I never smile never laugh i keep my mouth closed
Often i wear a scarf to veil my physical deformity to strangers
I feel so vulnerable so fragile when I interact with strangers
Wearing a scarf a hoodie sunglasses putting on this mask to make myself invisible to the world to shelter myself from the derision of humanity to protect my flaws from others who look down on my glimmering ugliness

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